Lies That Women Tell……

Women on the other hand tend to fall in both categories of lies. Either White lies/Blatant lies, they frequent both. However, while men lead in the quantity aspect of lies, the quality of lies told by women can’t be undermined. 

The societal norm of judging women harshly doesn’t help either. Thereby making it easier to tell these lies and keep secrets way more than men. The religious sentiments only fuel matters. The cultural expectations nkor? That is another icing on the cake. 

This factor thus encourages women to nurture their lies & make truth a secret. Reason why an average African woman would lie about the real details of her teens. When she knows her adulthood can be judged by her ignorant teens. How about her relationship history? Ofcourse, the number of exes are better reduced. Even her doctor is exempted from knowing the truth & details of her abortion history. 

So if your woman decides to come clean about the; lies she told, sins committed & buried secrets, there is need to cut her some slacks and be more understanding in such situation no matter the gravity. WHY?

A woman confessing without being caught is a noble act in the world of secrets, more importantly in a society where they are easily judged & condemned. Be kind enough to treat it as an honor that it is. For she has finally come to terms with her obligation to be the woman she ought to be with you. 

Rejection will never make such feet firm.Yes! No form of lie is justifiable but note that some can be TENABLE and others FORGIVABLE. Understand that behind those lies she told is the fear of a judgemental society which you also belong & the fear of loosing something so dear – YOU.

And that ‘You’ have three tools at your disposal…….the right to stay angry, the choice to forgive & the chance to forget. Use them wisely, for a woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets only a wise man can swim through.
Cont’d

NB: read yesterday’s post for better understanding.

Lies That Men Tell……

Men tell more lies than women but while the former(men)take the lead in ‘quantity’, the latter (women) probably wont be won over when it comes to quality. When people mention ‘lies’ as one of their dislikes, my expression is like ‘really? Because you just did. 

The truth is everybody lies. For different reasons we all do. Especially in relationships. Some for good reasons and some for bad. However, a lie is a lie irrespective of the motive. 

There are two categories of lies:

1) Necessary lies/White lie.

2) Blatant lies/Real lies.

Necessary lies are those told out of compulsion to protect either yourself or the recipients from the hurt of reality. 

This kind of lies are usually harmless and told for purposes that speaks more for the recipient than the ‘liar’ (teller). They’re mostly selfless. For instance, calling a not-so-fine friend pretty when asked, is a necessary and healthy lie, as you have succeeded in:

A. Fueling her self esteem and helping the human race create another self-confident person which is good for development.

B. Ridding yourself off loosing a friend and gaining an additional enemy. Trust me, the world is full of people wanting to bring you down and you don’t wanna add someone new to the list (crew).

Real lies on the other hand are told for selfish reasons and are usually kept secret for security or peace keeping purposes.

Apparently, men tend to do much of the white lies than the other and most women are smart enough to depict their men’s lies while they pretend to believe it. 

But hey! Isn’t it still a man’s world? Where they’re fairly judged and the societal norm favors their actions more than condemnation. Another reason why they hardly feel guilt. At least not enough in quantity to make them wanna spill. 

So should your man come clean of his lies and sins out of his own goodwill without being caught, sweetheart,just throw him a party and celebrate his holiness in grand style…………if you wan hear the part two.

NB; to be continued……

In Btwn Loyalty & Slavery……

In the world of love & relationships,it is sometimes hard to separate the two because It’s a very thin line between the two BUT in between Loyalty & Slavery is something called Respect.

It is no wonder we see some couples & wonder why they are still together Or perhaps why the victim spouse has refused to walk away.

I remember growing up, how ladies ridiculed guys all because they are loyal. The mighty Mozambique Hall where you’d see guys calmly seated waiting for bae to come & bae comes in (or not) acting irritated but it doesn’t stop lover boy from marking attendance in the same room the next day.

Did I mention the mighty Moremi Hall? those are for the four legged men of course. Oh how hard it was for the pencil trousers guys to feature. You just already know where you belong. 

It takes a number of heartbreaks for them to finally see potentials in the young man in pencil pant. That’s when you hear he is futuristic, from the same lady who couldn’t see the future earlier…….hmm!  Then you hear them chanting men are heartless. Hmm, Sis what did you do with the one at your reach? Not your type right? Great! See how you turned out not to be the type for the one you claim to be your type

Loyalty deserves respect in return but when the respect goes amiss, you can rest assured it is slavery. It is okay not to like the pencil guy on your case but at least be nice about it. Rather than clutching him for assignments & lecture purpose…….Na only you waka come????

Yes you are right to want what you want but understand that Loyalty becomes a threat when abused. You can be nice about your No and still earn yourself a safe landing in crisis.

Always remember that Loyalty deserves respect & loyalty is rare. So if you find one, never abuse it………keep it.

What Men Don’t Know…..

Unknown to most is the fact that ‘a woman in love’ is the best weapon any man can possess & to win the race of life, this weapon is more than enough…

A woman in love is like a Barbie or Mannequin with a predictable stereotyped  mindset. They mostly have two things in common, Energy & Prayer. These two elements they channel to the success of their spouse.

Now let me tell you a secret, ‘a woman in love’ doesn’t  remember to pray for herself, not because she doesn’t need it but cos she’s of the opinion that her success lies in your success.

So she channels the energy required for two successes into the success of one. Now imagine the speed & volume of the result as such. Almost like rocket on aim.

So when you find yourself ‘a woman in love’, ensure she never get cured by giving her more of love because your progress becomes a slow process the moment she does.

Behind every successful man is a woman in love…….

Zee World…….

Ladies!Ladies!!Ladies!!!……..

How many times did I call you, hmm. Stay away from zee world before you find yourself in my corner. 

I was feeling super excited on this day when my channel search took me to Zee world……hmm. Arti & Yosh abi, I hear. It was Chef Ranvi’s cooking session & the idea to be romantic struck.

Something continental for oga at the top. Hmm! I quickly grabbed my pen, wrote down ingredients & procedure. Got them in place ready for cook. I even initiated a fun chat with oga to make it fun. For my mind shey…..

So I started. One table spoon of coriander ,green chutney & bla bla bla cook for 5minutes etc. Followed all procedures, kept the ball rolling. Choi, I almost fainted when the meal was ready. The food refused to gel, I couldn’t even understand the color. Can’t recall which was worse, the taste or the look. 

I started sweating profusely and praying for traffic delay. Thank God for boiled rice. I grabbed my phone to confirm location so as to quickly boil rice,that was when I heard key ignition sound……chineke!!!

Rara o, it must be the neighbour’s……paka(door opening). The knob handle geared me back to life, chairman don come…….Jesus!!!! You go fear smile now. If you find yourself in this situation, bikko change the channel to supersport for compensation. 

I gather liver say time dey as oga go shower first now……that was when I heard “kilo se”(what’s cooking)…………..ah!Mogbe  o! Food wey I no even remember em name,yeepa!

Okay bye..

Missing Rib…….

Sounds familiar right??? Especially in this part of the world where the rule is simple; find yourself a good woman and put the ring on it…..that’s all it takes for everyone to start singing the missing rib lyrics.

But Bros what do we call all those women you courted before her? That’s even for the loyal ones. To them jiggars,how do you explain the lady/ ladies at the other end of your marital bliss? Did i hear you say replacement rib? Thunder wey go fire you dey gym.

How about the case of the developed nation, where marriage is like buying the latest car. You ride & change at will. When you hear statements like “I’ve been married six times”, then you understand we’re enjoying in Africa. That is when you wonder if they’ve got any rib left.

Ladies! Time to get Xray done for your man, so to know what a Casanova he has been. I can imagine an Ibo man xray, machine be like: 5ribs missing. The Hausas; rib intact, 100% perfect.

Hmm…….Yoruba man nkor. Just imagine the noise the machine will make ;- Warning!!!  Rib cage empty. No rib found.

What We Are……..

“I hate it when she cries, small thing you see her eyes dripping. Can’t women just control their emotions, Must they cry? It is annoying”.

Words from a friend who couldn’t stand his wife’s tears. Irritated by the way she cries amidst misunderstanding and hurts. His question was simple, yet deep. 

Men always wonder why tears are quick to run through a woman’s eyes & they are quick to conclude that women are just extremely emotional. The misconception that women are the weaker sex in emotional matters is as old as the earth itself & the world fail to understand that women are far from weak.

Your crying spouse wasn’t born weak. She hardly cried when the yoke was new. Her emotional strength was on the high side. I bet you remember how winning her over didn’t come cheap. That was her in her real self. 

“We are as strong as they are until we fall in love”……she was as strong as you are until she fell in love & your love became a blackmail to her strength. 

So appreciate the tears dearie & be glad when they show up for you. For the day they stop flowing is the day you cease to be her weakness. 

Women are stronger than strength…….

The Famous Rival…….

There is one unique culture that never dies. It’s an amazing one that has brought people of different skin & tribes under one voice. It is a sport called Football.

It’s the famous rival women constantly deal with & guess what, It is football weekend again. Take a chill pill ma’am, football isn’t as boring as you make it sound. It’s 90minutes of fun with a little bit of tension & we love every bit of it.

I love football and I still recall how hubby love to flaunt the fact that his wife is a football lover in public. How he’d proudly carry the food pack while I tuck the little one in a carrier & off we go to watch the game. The gloom on his face is priceless, always quick to update me on scores when I can’t watch. 

The point is, Men love it when you show interest in their favorite sport. It waters their planted ego & just might give you additional access to their mumu button. 

Imagine how much joy it will bring to have your spouse show some interest in your favourite show or movie. 

Give football a try this weekend ladies & you just might ditch your Telemundo for sport.

May Your Road Be Rough………

I was in SS2 when I first heard this phrase & I still recall how the whole class rumbled in discomfort that faithful day. It was an English Language period when the English teacher Mrs Oyelakin (rest in peace) said to her pupils; May your road be rough.

Imagine the reaction of a typical African to such, let alone ignorant teenagers. We murmured back the phrase beneath our breath, as though in form of a curse. It took her the whole subject period to explain herself & at the end of her session,we chorused ‘Amen’ to the phrase in delight.

Here we go………

Gemstones are well valued & they never loose their value, they only appreciate & depreciate in price. Same goes for coal,crude and many being mined across the globe but despite the value placed on these resources, their location is never refined. 

Murky, dirty, hilly and sloppy. The road to mines are usually very rough but it doesn’t affect the products. 

So how rough is your path? Abraham Lincoln rough or Frederick Douglass? Nelson Mandela or Moshood Abiola? Ursula Burns or JK Rowling? These are people who rose from rags to riches & it was far from smooth. It must have been weary back then but if asked now, there is no doubt they wouldn’t trade the rough patches for the world. You know why? Because it was worthwhile. 

The road to the usual success is smooth and easy but the path to greatness is far from pretty. Reason why jeeps were made to cruise on bumps, they are bigger & better………..

” Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get” – Ray Kroc (1902-1984)
May your road be rough!

Behind Closed Doors…….

Ever watched a pretty woman walk tall in high stilettoes? So much that you wonder how she lift each leg with ease. Yet there she goes walking like a tall glass in a flawless rhythm. What’s worse is the smile she manages to pull amidst the pain. A perfect way to explain the human heart. 
The eyes that hurt all through the weekend, the mind that grieved over lost opportunities, the souls that mourned at the thought of should haves, all up & about like the morning flowers. The sassy corporate look with smokey makeover, Pretty tie that compliment a perfect shirt. Ready to run the weekly marathon.
Who could tell she wept all night, when all you see is a radiant smile. Who would know his heart still aches. Oh! If only she knows they also have their sorrows. That colleague she envies, had a night filled with tears too. All she needs is a great man, to love & call her own. He wants a fancy cool car, to rid him of his legedis Benz. All my friends are married & am stuck in single hood. Oh if only we see what lies behind closed doors. She drives her own wheel & pay her own bills,she’s definitely happy…..that’s what you think right?
The list is endless and our desires vary but the rich also cry. That thing you so want, the one you attach so much happiness to, might just fail to end your grieve. If only we could have a peek behind closed doors, we just might see that happiness is a decision & it is ours only to make.
So enjoy your current state & be thankful while still in the hallway before the door opens. If you hate the journey, what makes you think you would love the destination.
Nothing will be same in a year from now. So Live it up!

#YOLO